All By My Sel-el-elf

Recently I have come across a new concept. Quality time spent... alone. Alone? Who would have thought spending time by yourself could be as entertaining as spending time with other people?
I can remember days long ago when the time I shared in the company of myself was my most treasured. I remember long road trips with caramel apple lollipops, and really loud music blasting from my speakers. I remember random truck stops and crappy diners. I can even remember the time I picked up my first hitchhiker at a Burger King in Ohio. I remember long walks on the beach and hiking up the mountain at Maverick's to watch the surfers at sunset. I remember all those things that I used to do on my own, and can't remember how I did it.

I am not entirely sure when my love of alone time dissapated, but I now know that it has. Strangely I can remember being in a crappy relationship and struggling to get just one minute of alone time, one moment where I was not hearing his voice or feeling his presence. I fought tooth and nail to get the hell out of that house and be alone. But once that crappy relationship ended I was not prepared for the pure solitude that comes with being alone. So until recently I have surrounded myself by at least one other person at all times, even when I am asleep.Then one day I had an epiphany "Good Lord, I must be really freaking annoying to everyone that I know." I realized then that this fear of aloneness is something that I need to work on actively, as talking about it just never quite provides the outcome you are expecting.


There was going to be more to this, but I decided I was sick of looking at it in my draft section. So... you get the unfinished version.
Sorry